My Mom is here. I love having her here.
She is amazing, my Mom. She has no idea just how amazing she is, or how much I look up to her.
Tonight, as we were talking, she told me that she doesn't feel like she is a very good person. I tried to explain to her, that she is who I try and be more like, when I am trying to be better, and trying to be a better, more Chirstlike person.
She lives her life in a simple faith, and a simple reverence. She never boasts of all the good she does for others, and she never stops trying to be better. I learn more from her example than any man's words.
Tonight as Reagan was crying, really struggling with being sick, she climbed up on my Mom's lap, and told her how hard it was, and couldn't she be done now? She didn't want to take anymore medicine, and my Mom said something that she has said to me a thousand time growing up, and something that has echoed in my head whenever life gets just a little bit too hard. "You can do hard things Reagan, I promise, you can do hard things."
Jesus promised us, that it wouldn't be easy, but it would be worth it. It must be possible to do hard things, if he promised us we can.
Sunday, January 20, 2013
Day 19
Sometimes...most times, when I pray for help, and relief, the Lord sends me my Mom. Adam had to go back to work today, and I was pretty worried how I would survive on my own with 2 really, really, sick fussy kids that just wanted to be held constantly.
My sweet Mom came to my rescue yet again, and has been a pure blessing. It is always good to have her here, and I really enjoy all the I learn from her.
Tonight, as I went to bed, I walked by the kids rooms to check on them, before I went down. When I walked by Reagan's room, I paused at the door to peak my head in, and I saw something I grew up seeing, something I have seen a thousand times, but something that touches me, and teaches me each time I see it, there at the foot of Reagan's bed, was my Mom, her head bowed in prayer.
I feel like I pray constantly, but I rarely give it the reverence it deserves, the reverence I was taught in my youth. On your knees, head bowed, simple, pure, thoughtful, and heart felt prayer. I also know, growing up listening to her pray, that along with the many people she prays for, that her prayers are full of gratitude, and thanks for the things she has been blessed with.
I was reminded of how much we receive from prayers, and how much more care I need to give them.
My sweet Mom came to my rescue yet again, and has been a pure blessing. It is always good to have her here, and I really enjoy all the I learn from her.
Tonight, as I went to bed, I walked by the kids rooms to check on them, before I went down. When I walked by Reagan's room, I paused at the door to peak my head in, and I saw something I grew up seeing, something I have seen a thousand times, but something that touches me, and teaches me each time I see it, there at the foot of Reagan's bed, was my Mom, her head bowed in prayer.
I feel like I pray constantly, but I rarely give it the reverence it deserves, the reverence I was taught in my youth. On your knees, head bowed, simple, pure, thoughtful, and heart felt prayer. I also know, growing up listening to her pray, that along with the many people she prays for, that her prayers are full of gratitude, and thanks for the things she has been blessed with.
I was reminded of how much we receive from prayers, and how much more care I need to give them.
Saturday, January 19, 2013
Day 18
We have been going for drives each night with the windows partially down, so that the kids can get some cold air in their lungs to help them breathe.
Tonight as we were out driving, we drove by the Temple. My sweet Reagan excitingly said: "Someday, I will put on my Princess Dress, and I will get married in that castle to my Prince".
There are many things I wish for my kids to have, but there isn't anything I want more for them, than to be married for eternity. I want more than anything for them to keep that desire, and hope with them forever, and to make that important choice.
It makes me wonder if this is a what Heavenly Father feels with us, to a small degree at least. That hope that we will keep our lives, thoughts, and deepest dreams focused on the Temple, and on eternity.
I wonder if He, like I do, sees that wonder, desire, and hope in our eyes, that I see in hers, and see that eternal promise, and blessing unfolding into something amazing.
Tonight as we were out driving, we drove by the Temple. My sweet Reagan excitingly said: "Someday, I will put on my Princess Dress, and I will get married in that castle to my Prince".
There are many things I wish for my kids to have, but there isn't anything I want more for them, than to be married for eternity. I want more than anything for them to keep that desire, and hope with them forever, and to make that important choice.
It makes me wonder if this is a what Heavenly Father feels with us, to a small degree at least. That hope that we will keep our lives, thoughts, and deepest dreams focused on the Temple, and on eternity.
I wonder if He, like I do, sees that wonder, desire, and hope in our eyes, that I see in hers, and see that eternal promise, and blessing unfolding into something amazing.
Friday, January 18, 2013
Day 17
Today is all about small and simple blessings.
After a long night in the hospital with my baby, we got to come home, which was a huge blessing.
Many prayers were answered by him being able to come home.
There is this amazing thing that happens, when you snuggle a baby close to you. A piece of you is healed. When you hold a baby close, and breath them in, there is a peace that comes. My faith in everything is healed.
I have had many of those moments today, moments where I held my baby close, dreamed about what his life would be, about who he would be, and about what I needed to do for him, to help him be the man he needs to be.
And because he is so sick, my heart and mind are in constant prayer for him. As anyone who knows who has been in constant prayer for someone that they care for with their whole heart, it's a really special spiritual experience. It is the one thing that helps me not feel like I am failing him.
After a long night in the hospital with my baby, we got to come home, which was a huge blessing.
Many prayers were answered by him being able to come home.
There is this amazing thing that happens, when you snuggle a baby close to you. A piece of you is healed. When you hold a baby close, and breath them in, there is a peace that comes. My faith in everything is healed.
I have had many of those moments today, moments where I held my baby close, dreamed about what his life would be, about who he would be, and about what I needed to do for him, to help him be the man he needs to be.
And because he is so sick, my heart and mind are in constant prayer for him. As anyone who knows who has been in constant prayer for someone that they care for with their whole heart, it's a really special spiritual experience. It is the one thing that helps me not feel like I am failing him.
Day 16
It's been a rough week at my house. Very sick kids, and a very tired mom.
I had a dear friend comment on my last post, as post I was pretty embarrassed about, considering all the whining.
As I've talked about before, most of the time, when we really are at the end of our rope, and we pray for help, the Lord sends someone to bless you, to let you know he is there, and he is listening.
Well, I was at the end of my rope, and I was really struggling. I was tired, and my babies were sick, and I didn't know what else to do. I felt like I was failing as a parent, since nothing I seemed to do was making my babies better. Day 15, was the longest night I think I have ever had.
Two blessings happened on Day 16, first, by the grace of God, we did survive the night. It truly felt like a miracle by the time morning happened. And two, on my desperate, near emotional breakdown blog post, I received the sweetest, uplifting comment from an old friend, and fellow mother. I'm sure to her it seemed like a small thing, but to me, it meant the world, and reminded me that I am not alone, even in the hardest nights of my life.
I had a dear friend comment on my last post, as post I was pretty embarrassed about, considering all the whining.
As I've talked about before, most of the time, when we really are at the end of our rope, and we pray for help, the Lord sends someone to bless you, to let you know he is there, and he is listening.
Well, I was at the end of my rope, and I was really struggling. I was tired, and my babies were sick, and I didn't know what else to do. I felt like I was failing as a parent, since nothing I seemed to do was making my babies better. Day 15, was the longest night I think I have ever had.
Two blessings happened on Day 16, first, by the grace of God, we did survive the night. It truly felt like a miracle by the time morning happened. And two, on my desperate, near emotional breakdown blog post, I received the sweetest, uplifting comment from an old friend, and fellow mother. I'm sure to her it seemed like a small thing, but to me, it meant the world, and reminded me that I am not alone, even in the hardest nights of my life.
Tuesday, January 15, 2013
Day 15
Daddy is at work, both kids are in my bed watching Phineas and Ferb, it's 11:33 pm, and I'm beat. I haven't slept for days, and am sick myself, but my little man is so sick, he is just on the line of being admitted into the hospital, so here we are, watching tv, in between the frequent bursts of screaming, crying, and coughing so hard he either passes out (literally), or pukes everywhere. I'm trying to not have a full blown emotional breakdown, and listen for proper breathing from both my crazy bad asthmatic 3 year old, and my very very croupy, bronchitis sick 18 month old. If the three of us survive this night, it will only be because of the Grace of God.
Day 14
Ok, I'll be honest, I am having a really hard time coming up with something for Day 14, and Day 15... Both kids are really sick, and I am not feeling great+no sleep= a not patient mommy.
I guess today's faith builder, is the forgiveness and kindness of children. I have been pretty short and impatient with Reagan, I can't handle much more whiny-ness, and she just keeps forgiving me and loving me regardless. I need to do better, even when I'm tired.
I guess today's faith builder, is the forgiveness and kindness of children. I have been pretty short and impatient with Reagan, I can't handle much more whiny-ness, and she just keeps forgiving me and loving me regardless. I need to do better, even when I'm tired.
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